Alone, but not lonely

Seeking company of others in childhood and adulthood, driven by varied expectations makes a fascinating study. To say that in the former case hardly any pre-determined rules of the game as it were marks the effort amounts to saying the obvious. The first day’s scene of kids mingling disdainfully in the now-common play schools should be sufficient proof for the above postulate. Thanks to the role model of sorts, read elder members of the family in the home environment, keenly observed by the kids, factors of class, creed, tongue, ethnicity, food habits, faith, attire, educational status and so on, not to forget even complexion impact the mind as the kids progress into first boyhood or girlhood and then to adulthood. There begins the story of bias-ridden life of a majority of the land’s people. Although humans, being generally gregarious, flock together, per force or otherwise, unlike in the birds, the factor of expectation for seeking company in the face of liking or disliking for myriad reasons results in groupisum.

The well-known idiom ‘Birds of the Same Feather Flock Together’ holds its vast meaning as long as no bird gets isolated. Persons in the place of such a bird have no option other than being alone. Cases of a person choosing to be alone either for peace while at work, particularly for literary pursuits or meditation and being forced to be alone under different compulsions of life are different kettles of fish.

Not many have the ability to be alone mentally even though they are amidst a gathering of relatives or friends or co-workers at their respective work places. To be alone, such as in cases of persons who have to be away from their loved families for various compulsions, and yet not lose enthusiasm to carry on in life is also not everyone’s cup of tea. In a contrasting situation as it were, witnessing persons forced to be alone in spite of being in the company of family members under the same roof is also a feature of society. The foregoing three varied situations of persons being alone prompt one to raise a very important question: Are such persons who are prime facie alone, experiencing the trauma of feeling lonely? If the answer is ‘yes,’ it calls for psychologists, psychiatrists, sociologists and other knowledgeable persons to provide guidelines on mitigating that bug called loneliness.

As long as anyone who is alone for whatever reason and experiencing loneliness is not driven to depression, all is well. Given the well-known fact of depression leading to suicide in an increasing number of incidents, loss of lives what that need to be saved, it is imperative to think of a changed societal structure that being alone need not mean loneliness. An idle mind is devil’s workshop. Let not devils proliferate.