Ambition should be… Expected not Excused

A heartfelt letter from the first Woman Chairperson of CII, Mysuru, who is moving cities to pursue her ambitions…

Hey, I have some news — I’m relocating to Luxembourg!”

I say it again, still getting used to the weight of those words. A new country, a new role, a new adventure — a whirlwind of emotions — as I feel excited, nervous, curious and maybe just a little wait, am I   really doing this?

And then come the questions.

“Will your husband move with you?” Nope.

“What did your parents say?” They’re proud.

“And your in-laws?” Also proud.

“But is your husband okay with it?”

This one always makes me pause. Yes, of course, he is. Shouldn’t he be? I answer, sometimes with a smile, sometimes amused, sometimes just… reflecting. And after the interrogation ends, I finally say, “Now that we’ve covered all that, you could also congratulate me. Or maybe ask how I feel?”

It intrigues me — this idea that a woman’s success must first pass through family approval. That before celebrating

her, we must confirm that no one around her is unsettled. That ambition in a woman is not just hers to own — it must be justified.

Yet, I’ve never had to choose. My parents raised my sister and I to believe we could do anything. My in-laws never questioned my career. My daughter has never asked why I work, travel or lead. And my husband, my best friend since I was 16, has always stood beside me, cheering me on —sometimes even joking, “Ah, back to bachelor life again!”

Still, I realise how rare that is. When I became the first woman Chairperson of Confederation of Indian Industry (CII) Mysuru Zone, for the year 2022-23, I remember thinking, Why haven’t more women done this before? Not because they couldn’t — but because they weren’t told they could.

And so, as I step into this new chapter, I think about how often women are defined in relation to others — as daughters, mothers, wives first and as individuals second. But I am all of those things, and I am also me.

As yet another Women’s Day arrives — I truly hope for a world where a  woman’s success doesn’t come with a list of questions. Where ambition is expected, not excused.

So, I move forward — not just to a new role, a new country — but into a space where I can simply be. Where choices need no validation — no explanation.

Because isn’t that the future we should all be working towards?