Sir,

I was really touched to read N.K.A. Ballal’s article titled “Time for Family” in SOM dated May 17. Tears started to flow over my cheeks.

Little more than eight years ago, I called my father in Mysuru. It was in the month of November 2009 to be precise. He said, “I want to hand over some of the things about family and want to talk less and meditate more.” I even chided him as to why he should say such things. Because, in my mind, he is healthy at 85 years with no medical issues and a very active person. I used to call him once a month or so and visit once a year from the US.

December came and went, January and February also came and went… I was ‘busy’ for one reason or the other. In the meantime, my wife became sick and I did not want my dad to know because he was very much attached to her and I was afraid something might happen to him if I mention about my wife’s illness. He did not want me to call unless he could speak with my wife too. Before that time came, during the first week of March 2010, I got a phone call from India. What other news can I expect? My father passed away peacefully.

I was and am still devastated for not being with him sufficiently, not conversing with him frequently, not able to say “Thank You” to him for millions of things that he did to me throughout his life. How can I repay him? He was just a “Railway clerk” and I am a Neurosurgeon. I would trade anything in life to get him back, even for a few days, but I know I am asking for impossible things to happen.

Everyday I look up to him because he is my God. I am nobody in front of him. Occasionally, I cry when I am alone. To compensate for my unforgivable mistakes, now I visit Mysuru at least 3-4 times a year to see my mom, brother and sisters, who all live in Mysuru.

I thought of sharing my story to let people know that I am one of those who made the mistake of missing family time. I will be in Mysuru between June 4-6 and if I could meet you and Mr. Ballal even for just half an hour, I would be happy.

– Dr. Shankar Gopinath , USA, 21.5.2018

Note: …which is why Osho Rajneesh says, ‘Now is the time. Be wakeful always like the Buddha. Tomorrow may be too late. Might be it was too late a tomorrow for Dr. Shankar to spare some family time. —Ed

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