I love myself and I have complete freedom to flap my wings and I do not need anyone’s permission to do so: Dr. Akkai Padmashali

Mysore/Mysuru: Inclusivity is still a far cry for the queer community. Bengaluru-based transgender activist and author Dr. Akkai Padmashali gave a rights-oriented perspective on the transgender struggle for equality and inclusivity in a session ‘Not an outsider – just different, like each one is’ at the sixth edition of the two-day Mysuru Literature Festival that concluded yesterday at Hotel Southern Star on Vinoba Road.

The festival was organised by Mysuru Literary Forum Charitable Trust and Mysuru Book Clubs-2015. Akkai’s session was with writer Vasudhendra and Mohua Chinappa, moderated by Bharath Divakar.

From being a pioneer in entering the marriage institution as a transwoman to being at the forefront of the campaign against Section 377 (consensual sexual intercourse between same-sex people as an unnatural offence which is against the order of nature), Padmashali’s journey has become an identity to the  LGBTQ community.

“I love myself and I have complete freedom to flap my wings and I do not need anyone’s permission to do so. I will decide my identity and you will not. I want to live like a woman and I am a woman without a menstrual cycle. This is my identity and I would like to identify myself like this,” were her words.

“Through literature, I wanted to tell my personal story, that of my community, and the systems we need to change in the country. A large part of my activism is to bring to light issues that sexual minorities face. Also, there isn’t much literature on working-class sexual minorities in India. It’s important to bring empathy, not sympathy, to current struggles in the LGBTQ community,” she said.

“I grew up in an atmosphere where I could hardly breathe and was always kept away from society. I appeared scary to my parents, siblings, relatives, friends and society. My true identity was hidden and my voice was crushed. It has been a long battle and my struggles have given the community some hope. There was resistance initially but it was also about agitation against the brutality committed on sexual minorities,” she revealed.

‘Book gave back life’

After hiding his sexual preference for three decades, Vasudhendra decided to reveal his sexual identity with the release of this book in a fictional character named ‘Mohanaswamy’. Unable to sleep for weeks, he decided to pen down his story. ‘Mohanaswamy’ is one of the first books in Kannada literature which portrays homosexuality. “A book can bring name, fame and other opportunities. But this gave me back my life,” he said.

When I look back at the challenges, I feel happy that I faced them instead of cowering down. After I began to write, I gained new friends all over. The response was so overwhelming that Mohanaswamy suddenly became omnipresent. The book had lost a few readers but it also created a new genre of readers,” he said. “Writing for me is like putting rangoli in front of your house. You connect the dots with lines. Intimate experiences are the dots. I connect the dots when I write. You can make different patterns with the same dots through modes of narration and through techniques,” he said.