Every relationship requires patience

Every relationship requires patience

August 13, 2020

By N.K.A. Ballal, Retd. Sr. Vice-President, ITDC

An interesting discourse by Sri Radheswami: Imagine you plant a seed and water it everyday for the whole year. Nothing happens. How would one react? With disgust and anger?  In China there is a type of bamboo tree which needs watering everyday for 5 years. Yes, you heard me right. Five years.  For five years nothing comes out of the ground  nevertheless there are experienced gardeners who keep watering the ground and lo what happens in the sixth year? This particular tree grows to about 80 ft in just 6 weeks !  

We can understand much about life through nature. It is not that we always get immediate results for what we do. Patience and consistency are essential.

Today, in this fast-paced world where everything is instant with  instant gratification we have everything on our fingertips — internet, latest technology, fast foods, entertainment etc. This expectation for instant results has now penetrated to our  relationships too. Work and     general ethos of the system. Deep relationships and meaningful accomplishments seldom happen quickly. They require intelligent inputs, sensitive efforts and patience. 

One does not become an accomplished artist within a week’s time of learning painting or one does not become a top-notch musician by just learning the notes from his Guru. It needs hours and hours of practice day in and day out and sometimes hours of riyaz for years to become a top-notch musician. One can see a man or woman becoming a dancer in a movie of 3 hours, but in real life this takes backbreaking practice of several hours. One mis-step and you may land in a hospital with a broken limb. 

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What is the reason, marriages are failing so fast across the world? Simple. High expectations, lack of patience to understand others’ point of view. Net result, record-breaking divorce applications ! A single law firm has reported that it has got approximately 7,500 applications in a month compared to an average of 2,000 pre-COVID. 

“Immunity.” Everyone is talking about it. Lemon, ginger, haldi, tulsi, you name it and everyone is consuming the same with the hope that their system becomes COVID-proof. All kinds of multi-vitamin tablets, vitamin C tablets are being consumed.  Immunity building is a slow process and one can do it over a period of years and not days!     

When raising a child you may be frustrated to see the result initially. After nearly a year the child says his first word. Thereafter his speed increases and he starts to utter new words practically every day. The joy of hearing these words is lost if we start pressurising the child  to  learn a new word everyday. Every child is different. So what is required is patience in handling the situation and understanding. However if we raise our children by proper disposition and values, your child can grow up to be someone you can be proud off. But this takes years of patience.  

Timeless wisdom of Vedas explain that the formula for success is to define our goals and values and then pursue them with patience and enthusiasm. It is this combination that helped us to pass through the struggles that we encounter and try to succeed. Without enthusiasm there is hardly any progress and without patience we may give up or become reckless when results do not come according to our expectations. 

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Let us view each part of our lives. Never be discouraged if we try our best and still fail.

What is the moral of this discourse:  Simple, everything cannot be achieved in a hurry. If one wants to excel in any sphere, one has to put in lots of efforts and time to be the best. 

There was a boy in the US, who due to his brilliance became a doctor at an age of 18 and what happened ? No patient was ready to accept him as his or her doctor. He had to wait several years before he developed  a  “senior look” for his patients to accept him as a doctor.

Thank God, that in spite of all the technology  breaks, it still takes  nine  months for a child to be born. No short cuts there. In a relationship too, give time, hang on. You may succeed. 

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ONE COMMENT ON THIS POST To “Every relationship requires patience”

  1. Hello, hello! says:

    Ballal, you write nonsense.
    What do you have to do to write better and meaningful articles; “Simple, everything cannot be achieved in a hurry. If one wants to excel in any sphere, one has to put in lots of efforts and time to be the best.” This applies to you so very well!

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